Feline Competition

As much as I love Ramadan and all the late hours glory, there comes with the month some tedious formalities that I m expected to fullfill, such as dragging myself out of my couch in the middle of my semi hypnotic brainless TV watching spree to get completely decked out for Grandmother's Istiqbal. At the Istiqbal I'm expected to flash my ebullient smile to every passing guest, pour tea/coffee, and pass out confectionary sweets and chocolates while being completely and utterly sized up and devoured by every encroaching eye that inevitably makes a mental note of my score and general rank in the female scale of marriage potential. Down with my 200 grand college degree, the four years that I slaved in school to discover what it is that ignites me, my worldly experiences and interests, because bottom line the basis of my score all boils down to how I perform and appear in social functions. Lovely.

So with all the superficial kissing and redundant greetings to the dozens of people that I don't even know, and that I hardly expect will have any impact on my matrimonial fate, (contrary to what Grandmother and Mother believe) I finally found a moment to sit down, relax, and perhaps reflect on the whole theatrical performance in front me.

In came Degenerate, a childhood enemy that found a passion to compete with me in every possible aspect of life, strutting down the hallway of Grandmother's salon, prada bag swaying in the air. I gaze at Degenerate momentarily, her Prada clad outfit disturbing my philanthropic conscience recently ignited by previous day's reading of "make poverty history" campaign efforts. We engage in the regular superficial conversation about life and work, usually aimed to advertise and embellish the glamour of our lives to each other, and subsequently to incite envy and mild depression, untill she shoots for the jackpot:
Degenerate: so CD you must be really depressed working in a government institution, being underpaid and all.
CD: hehehh..Its not so bad, half of the time I'm travelling so I find it quite exciting.
Degenerate : Oh? (Gaining sudden interest in my satisfaction and raising her eyebrows unwittingly) where do you travel to?
CD: All over; Europe , USA and Asia. I'm excited we're going to start visiting South America very soon.
Degenerate: (fuming under her breath) I would hate to have a job like that, whats the fun with travelling anyway? You just attend your meetings and go back to the hotel. It must be so tiring and boring. I feel bad for you habibti taksireen il khaa6er.

Ok, this is surpassing my ability to maintain civil behavior to repugnant human beings that I can not stand. At this point, I can either externalize my disgust by ripping her spine out of her throat, or I find myself vocalising statements treading on strictly banned territory:
CD: Really? It certainly beats lounging at home all day. So why did you quit your job? (Grandmother eyeing me intensely, considering I was instructed not to bring this up to Degenerate, for she was fired)

Degenerate mumbles some bs about having time to go to the gym, read, enjoy the spa and hang out with friends. In other words, make herself appear like the complete spoiled unmotivated idiot that she is to the audience seated in Grandmother's living room. Not that it mattered to them that she is one, but it brought wailing joy to my personal account and score of female ranking.