A Cockroach on crack
A Cockroach On Crack is a heinous human being that hovers around my floor, under the delusion that his presence is welcome and appreciated, when in fact everyone dodges his repugnant existence the moment he creeps out of his gutter, and finds his way onto our hallway. The Cockroach doesn't only waste our time through petty, sometimes disgusting conversation, but also likes to stick his business in other peoples private life. Today, I was his target.
As he wriggled upon my office, he started twitching and scratching his hideous nose -a minefield of dirt, and used the excuse of needing some tissues to enter into my office. Despite my cold reception, and the blatant frown that crept onto my face, the delusional Cockroach uninvitedly plopped himself on a chair (thus soiling it irreparably) and subjected me to a timeless torture -a meaningless chit chat with himself:
Cockroach: So I heard you've recently been to X country.
CD: yeah. I have.
Cockroach: how was it?
CD: it was fun
Cockroach: so what did you do?
CD: not much, movies, shopping that kinda thing
Cockroach: Im planning to take a vacation from my wife and kids next month, (he winks mischeviously) would you recommend to go to that country as a single man?
I'm not sure why this crack smoker decided to just blurt that out, perhaps he believes it is 'cool' and admirable to reveal his lack of respect to his wife. As a woman, I am instantly insulted by this question. But I have no interest to criticise/debate his family values with him:
CD: wallah madri 3anik. (I don't know)
Cockroach: Shaklich istaanistaay ihnak. Ashoof il 9ewar 3ala il 6oofah (you seem like you had fun there, as I have noted from the pics on your wall)
CD:Al-hamdila, it was nice.
Cockroach: ishloon il sahraat ihnak? yegooloon khosh nightclubs!
!!
What a stupid, idiotic thing to say. Y3nee is this the best he can do to squeeze some information about my private life? to see if I would slip into admitting if I do indeed go to nightclubs? What is this low-down piece of shit really on? I understand that his curiousity is a salient feature of our society; an urgent need to know private details of individuals that display the slightest hint of happiness. But come on, there are other indirect ways to extract malicious gossip. Coming to me and divulging your own nasty desires to cavort on a holiday (sans the lucky madamme) is not gonna get me to disclose a single thing, not even a trip to the beach!
But the real issue over here is this man's unabashed comfort level in having this hideous conversation with me. Ok, I'm not born yesturday, I am aware that there are immoral married men that like to take solo trips to engage in forbidden frolic and debauchery. But what is up with this frankness, this openess in having a discussion about it with me?
What have we come to?
posted by Closet Diva @ 23.1.06
14 comments
14 Comments:
What a little shit. And I second zinzinq8's comment on the bastard's cockroach-like features :P And I'm not surprised that such species do exist. Age and location isn't a factor too, unfortunately. And I too am also curious on your response. Does it by any chance involve the flinging of flimsy slippers and/or the end of broomsticks? I wonder...
All of a sudden, I hear "La Cucarancha, La Cucarancha" in the background when I read your post. You should get the human size equivalent of these cockroach traps and put them all over your office. You got a pest problem CD.
There are people out there in search of a decent family yet on the other hand you ppl like this guy who violate any trust and love that should exist.
Anyways, he is obviously a low-life, and you will find plenty across all walks of life. Private sector, government sector, you name it!
Anyways, nothing surprises me anymore. His attitude does seem disgusting however, and for that he should be shot.
Did you know you can swap the heads of two cockroaches over and they will stay alive? They have no spinal cord. Electronic signals are transmitted through their internal fluids.
Amazing creatures ;)
Why do you have pics of your trip in your office? thats asking for trouble.
Z,
I provided a neutral response, somewhere along the lines of " i think the clubs were nice, but i'm not sure".
erz,
bil 3aks, i was too curteous. I should have been rude. I was pissed about it the whole day.
Don V,
the technology expert, the creative thinker, you just inspired me to enclose the cucharacha song onto my post...
maybe if I have time.
entrep,
swap heads? thats very intersting.
purg,
i know personal pics invite work mates to peer into my personal life. But I practically live in my office, so I wanna make it personal and cozy.
And that is the mistake you make, never ever make your office space a home space, always make it simple and bare.
Notice how they ask you questions but do not answer any about themselves.
When he asked for tissue you should have sent him to the toilet.
I saw buy some Pif Paf
Aka Beef baaaf
3indina ew 3indich 7'air!!! gi6a3
purg,
simple and bare? I need my space to be fun so that I can work...cranking Ipod, pics and postcards, the works!
anonymous,
well in this case he was telling me a bit too much, more than I needed to know actually.
But you're right, nosy people do tend to pound you with personal questions and then refrain from answering any. God I hate those people, and avoid them like the plague.
Entrep,
lol, you're hilarious.
"you people like this guy who violate(s) any love or trust that should exist"
who is "you people"?? & I'll be damned if I ever liked an asshole that violates any love or trust.
mushimushi,
girl, he ain't no cockroach of mine!
And to be fair, I don't think he was hitting on me, I think he was just trying to seem cool by disrespecting his wife -and he was also trying to extract information about me, for whatever sick nosy reason.
hug,
u make me laugh :) rock on
jashanmal,
hehh, i'm kinda feeling guilty about this post. But you have no idea how pissed i was, and how much better I felt after writing it.
a3sab,
shiftay! hamdillah wil shikir.
human descrepancy,
that comment brought a big smile to my face! Thank you :) and welcome to ma blog.
thats the biggest mistake people make. Work is work and fun is fun, so do not mix the two. By making your space your home, you believe its your place to be, and leaving it would be tough, so never get attached to work space.
I can't stand cockroachs like that and man...there are so many around..especially in the summer...when it's hot and sticky..(the family is abroad and he's stuck at work bored and trying to find ways to entertain his cockaroachy self)...I HATE IT!
But...I have to agree with Purg...sadly...the low life cockroachs take the pictures as a sign that you're open with your life and therefore don't mind sharing...
Although I have pictures in my office...they're actually pictures of work related stuff...receiving an award...meeting with a VIP...etc...that way it gives me the homey feeling without going private..
Best way to get rid of cockroachs....you can't...they're creatures of this world and the only thing we can change is our attitude towards them...'coz honey...if there weren't any cockroaches in this world...how were we gonna appreciate the butterflies...:)..hope that makes sense!
loveeeeeeeeeeee ur descriptions, ur articulate use of words and sarcasm...love it to death....u really should be published! :)
jazzo
if you have an offer, I'm all for it!
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