A curmudgeon on a power trip

Vocabulary word of the day:

CURMUDGEON

curmudgeon: an irascible ill-temepered person

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In a normal world that follows the laws of logic and basic physics, when a person is promoted to a higher position and assumes greater responsiblity over his colleages, a new wave of confidence and satisfaction would envelope the employee as he rides up the glorious ladder of his career. Flowers and chocolates are sent, felicitations and congratulatory notes are expressed, and a shining promising light emanates over his future and radiates his disposition. But over here in government land, when an employee gets promoted (usually by default rather than true merit), he becomes more bigoted, irascible, egotistical, suddenly insecure about his newly established power, extremely aware of local gossip and consequently, transforms into a full-fledged CURMUDGEON.

It suddenly becomes the curmudgeon's mission in life to self-aggrandize his authoriy and aggressively emphasize his power over the people beneath him. And this is where I find myself being reprimanded for the most inconcievable ridiculous things, such as forwarding an email (which was sent to me in error) to the intended recipient. According to him, anything I send out of my inbox has be to checked with him first.
CD: but sir, this email was sent to me in error, I was simply forwarding it to the person that was supposed to receive it.
CURMUDGEON: You should have checked with me! I am your boss, I must be aware of anything and everything that leaves from my department.

I resist the urge to say "No need to remind me of your power honey, I'm the one that hand picked your chocolates for the occasion." And instead, I retort with the simple ginger polite response of "I understand".

But the other day I was asked to accompany him to an out-of-site meeting, the location of which he is unfamiliar with. As soon as we got out of the car, I led him inside the building and into the hallway of our designated meeting place, and this is where he suddenly bursts out with :
"CD, why are you walking in front of me?"
I incredulously awoke from my daze to see what he was fussing about, and noticed that I was only ONE step in front of him.
CD: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm just leading you the way.
CURMUDGEON: but you shouldn't walk in front of me, I'm your boss!
CD: I'm sorry, I unconsciously tend to walk a bit fast.
CURMUDGEON: yes you do. Walk slower.

So I slow down accordingly and I find him pracitically sprinting to be physcially ahead of me, making ME trail behind him as he springs his neck backwards to ask for directions. Right. All righty then. I'm sorry Im unaware of this appropriate etiquette of "walking with your superior", who am I but a lowly subordinate employee that continues to commit the sinful transgression of undermining your authority, and is in turn duly castigated with a verbal lashing filled with innuendos and unfounded angst.

Like the time I had my request for a vacation leave rejected. (I know I already wrote about it, but I'm still pissed). Usually my process is to fill out the form, and then bring it over to my boss and ask him for his signature -which is basically getting his verbal and written consent at the same time. But according to him, by filling out that form, I was already assuming that he was going to accept my vacation leave, and in that way I was undermining his authority. From what I understand, I am supposed to recieve his verbal consent FIRST and foremost, and then merrily trot away to produce the form.

On days when I am low in spirits, it really does take a considerable amount of strength for me to suppress myself from saying:

"Good grief. Get a grip.......and get a therapist while you're at it"